The "Motivational" Posters You Don't Get To Buy

"You can fool some of the people all of the time ....."

Sales? I like to think I have done well since I got here. Figures do not lie.

As the adage goes, "You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time."

Dedicated to one son of a bitch

If he is good, he will still be a Managing Director and not have lost his job.

Chrysler admits Sebring is a dud

The Detroit News got its hands on a transcript of a Q&A session held between Chrysler execs and employees of the company in which management admits the company misjudged the market when developing vehicles like the new Chrysler Sebring and Dodge Nitro. The transcript was confirmed to be legitimate by Chrysler spokesman Rick Deneau, who admitted it was never meant for the public to see. Nevertheless, the Q&A session shows that that there are many at Chrysler who are "quite upset" about how some vehicles turned out, which is illustrated most pointedly by the harsh criticism the Sebring and Nitro received from Consumer Reports.

In response, Chrysler says it is moving fast to fix its own internal development process so that it can better project what customers want and expect from their vehicles a few years down the road. It seems the current system is good at matching what competitors are offering now, but produces vehicles that arrive on the market behind the curve in terms of design, quality and interiors.

Full article from the Detroit News

Read The Truth About Cars' article on Chrysler Suicide Watch

Great American Cars: The Chevrolet Corvette Z06

Sure, gas prices in America are insane and the base model starts at USD70,000 but the Corvette Z06 is still spectacularly cool. This 2007 model packs in a 505-hp 7.0 Liter LS7 aluminum-block engine and also sports one the absolute best looking bodies of any GM power car ever made. It is GM's challenge to the Dodge Viper except sexier.

To say the Vette Z06 is mean is an understatement. It hits 100 kph from the standing block in 4 seconds with 637 Nm of Torque. To stop a car at that speed the Corvette Z06 employs monoblock six-piston front calipers and four-piston rear calipers.

Z06 achieves a power-to-weight ratio superior to many exotic cars like the Dodge Viper and the Ferrari F430, in part because of its lightweight, yet strong, aluminum frame combined with a magnesium roof structure and engine cradle. The aluminum body structure weighs only 278 pounds, 136 pounds less than the Corvette coupe.

Ten Sales and Marketing Tips I learned from Strippers

I got this over the Net. It isn't written by me but I think it makes interesting reading if you are in sales. It is something we can all relate to and how true it is.

Like you, I like strippers.

However, I generally find myself leaving the strip club with an empty wallet. Any business that can get you to spend all of your money is a good one to be in.

But while walking out of a club one evening, I realized that a big reason they have such a good business is because strippers are such great salespeople. It is not simply due to the fact that they are selling to stupid horny men, but because they use a lot of highly effective sales and marketing techniques.

You too can achieve great success by applying sales and marketing techniques of strippers. Here are the ten sales and marketing techniques I have learned from strippers:

Sales Technique #1 - Give them something for nothing
One of the first thing a stripper will do is come up to you and flirt. She will likely sit on your lap or do something to raise your excitement level. For this, you have to do nothing. However, you do get a sample of the service and if it is a good one, your chances of buying the service increases. This also applies to the dances they do on the stage.

Sales Technique #2 - Understand your customers
Strippers get to know their customers by asking questions. This allows them to develop a rapport and tailor the sales pitch…

Sales Technique #3 - Tailor the Sales Pitch
Strippers will try different sales pitches with different people based on what she thinks they like. “I like to get dirty” or “Have you seen my great ass?” or “My tits are real”. Each pitch may be the one thing that converts the potential customer into a buyer. (Pointing out a tight ass may work for some). And she revises her pitch based on experience.

Sales Technique #4 - Make sure you are selling a great product/service
She knows she has to have a great product. If she put on 30 pounds or hadn’t showered for the past 4 days, she would likely not get as many customers. Regardless of how great a salesperson you are, you can’t do much with a crappy product/service.

Sales Technique #5 - Provides Good Customer Service
She will make sure you are happy on your first dance or she won’t get repeat business or even do what she ultimately set out to do…Upsell.

Sales Technique #6 - Upsell
She sells the customer on a relatively cheap service, a lapdance, but then markets her other services to them. She tries to get them to the “champagne room” and sell an upgraded service, which is where the money is. However, without the first sale, she would never get the bigger sale. Customer's acquisition is tough. Once she does it, she needs to get as much business as she can.

Sales Technique #7 - Closing Techniques
She will use a variety of closing techniques to get you to buy her services. There are a variety of closing techniques, but two popular ones used by strippers are the compliment close (usually flirting with you) and companion close (getting your buddies to push you into closing the deal).

Sales Technique #8 - Target your audience
Strippers market to individuals that are interested in her service. First, she works in a strip club where guys go specifically for her service, that is obvious. But she also knows which guys to go after within a group or which groups will likely spend the most money. Spending time with cheap-asses only wanting to pay a dollar for a dance will not be a wise use of her precious time.

Sales Technique #9 - Persistence
Even though the audience is qualified, she knows she will get rejections. Even so, she will go up to every guy and ask if they need a lap dance. She also knows that the more guys she asks, the more yesses she will get.

Sales Technique #10 - Branding
I don’t know any strippers that are named Ethel, Mildred or Agnes. Instead, you will get the pleasure to do business with Cookie, Destiny, Candy, or Raven.

The new Mini Clubman was caught uncovered by the photographers. Unlike the prototypes, the new Mini Clubman has a small additional door made to facilitate the access to the back seats.

The range of motors will be basically the same one with the one on the Mini One. The version that appears in the photos is a Clubman Cooper S. The Clubman will have the modifications that were recently introduced on the Mini series.

The first Mini Clubman was in 1969. It measured 3,165 mm, 11 mm more than the normal Mini and less than the Mini Estate (3,400 mm in length). It also had the same width, height and wheelbase like the model from which it left, with slightly different a front part.

Ten Dumbest Quotes

Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.
- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign.

If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President

I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.
- Greg Norman, Golfer

Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff.»
- Mariah Carey, pop singer

They misunderestimated me.
- George W Bush, Bentonville, Arkansas

Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas.
- Keppel Enderbery, Former Australian cabinet minister

Put the 'off' button on.
- George W. Bush, Associated Press, 14th February 2000

If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.
- Dan Quayle, former U.S. Vice President

The internet is a great way to get on the net.
- Bob Dole, Republican presidential candidate

I don't make friends over a pound of salt.
- One son of a bitch